Big Personal News…
I have a big personal announcement here - I am joining the ranks and becoming a ShineSpace mom! Graham and I are expecting our first baby in late June, and I’ll keep you posted on all the updates (are you interested?)
This huge life change has made me reflect on my time and experience working with families, and how I’ve gotten here to the place I’m in now, supporting mamas to be the best they can be for their kids, finding time for joy, feeling grounded in their parenting, and discovering their own authentic brand of motherhood. All things I hope I’ll be able to discover on my own mothering journey, and some of these things are already coming up for me in a big way!
I don’t care about decorating a nursery. My mom called me today to talk about decorating the nursery and I found myself feeling apathetic. Immediately that made me guilty - am I not excited enough about this baby? Am I going to feel apathetic about other aspects of motherhood? Is my child destined to live in a barren and boring room? None of these things are true. We all know babies don’t need their own room when they come home, and as long as I provide a SAFE and cozy environment, I’m doing my job as a mom. I’ve always been a proponent of “good enough” parenting. Let’s save our energy for building a business, nurturing my marriage, and surviving pregnancy in a pandemic, and not worry too much about a nursery. Am I right?
We don’t know the gender yet… and we don’t know if we’re going to find out! I’m balancing the enticing trend of the gender reveal with my deep belief that gender is a social construct, and my hesitancy to start imposing an identity on my unborn child based on their chromosomes. We still don’t know if we will find out the sex of our baby now or when they are born, but either way we want to bring them up in a relatively gender-neutral way, and let them decide on their pronouns when they are ready.
Graham is going to be the best dad, and I sometimes compare my excitement to his. It can be hard not to feel like an unflattering mirror is held up when my husband is feeling unbridled joy and excitement, while many days feel like I’m just getting through. I’m lucky that physically pregnancy has been easy so far, but for me mentally and emotionally it has been really hard. That’s ok, there’s room for all of it. There’s room for anxiety, sad days, and excitement and they don’t have to be mutually exclusive. As mamas there is a lot going on with our minds and bodies as we grow a baby, and all we can do is be a present observer of it all.
Here’s to doing our best every day ❤
P.S. You’re a great mom.
Claire